laughter makes your heart smile

when i think of how much Ralph makes me happy, i swear my heart skips a few beats; just to tell me that it is happy too.

the way he can make me smile and laugh hysterically at nothing.

the way he can put a smile on my face when times look so grim.

bring absolute comfort to my life in a way that is gently hugging me.

the way he can read my mind and we can smile at each other without ever sharing a single word.

with each smile he brings to me, wrapping it's love around me and easily making my heart smile.

everyday with him is a day full and never empty.

going to bed at night and waking up each morning never fails me.

his sweet words, his handsome face, his amazing smile, his kind heart all remind me that he is always by my side holding my hand making my heart smile.

twiddled thumbs

 

Twiddled Thumbs blistered and worn.

Sacked green beans picked and split.

Garden green with fruitful life.

Sagging time stretching down.

Twiddled Thumbs held up at the hose.

Withered with water, sun warmed too cold.

Knelt over handling daily chores.

Sun hat billed round and red hankie wrapped neck.

Twiddled Thumbs crippled with exposure.

Plucked strawberries washed and jarred.
Daily living with no other want to house.
Happiness lies between aged shoulders and a back with many sore muscles.

Twiddled Thumbs wrapped in family ties.

Familiar laughter gathering kitchen talk.

Early mornings before dawn breakfast ate.

Clinking pans and tickled footsteps with four legs.

Warm smiles over sizzled bacon.

Twiddled Thumbs over welcoming embraces.

Charmed hands years of holding a lifetime together.

dead end

 

turn left, turn right, make up your mind.

no U turns,

Divided Highway.....

which way do we go?

what's the speed limit again.....

did i miss that sign?

there are no cross walks,

i haven't seen any Stop sigh n's

do you think that i should Yield?

i can speed up and slow down but my blinker is busted

so there will be no more turns to the

left or right.

straight ahead i drive on,

how much longer til i Stop?

it's dark now and i'm not alone.

it's time that we decide where to go.

looking in my rear view mirror i see....

red reflective glow from the brake lights.

Yielding to a Stop....

reading letters of a glowing sign....

Dead End.....

now it's time to back up, isn't it?

oh sister where art thou

Not so much when I was a child or even a teenager did I feel like I may be missing out on having a sister.

I was always the tomboy type girl, climbing one tree right after the next. Jumping bikes and skateboards right along side my brothers. Man some of those times where tough especially when you have five brothers, four older and one younger. I love all of my brothers dearly I can't imagine not having them in my life. When I  was a little girl my oldest brother Bill would always make sure the other boys didn't beat up on me too bad. My brother Bill is nine years older than me and he definitely treated me as the protected younger sister.

My brothers~ Bill, Joey, John, Robert & James

All of them bring me so many special memories, that I will hold very dearly in my heart. What I love about it is that the memories are all so different from one another, each one showing each of their personalities.

There is one thing I should mention regarding having all of these brothers though....

We're not the emotional type so we don't show our feelings, like sister's would.

We don't call on the phone or have to see each other daily to know that we all care and love one another, like sister's do.

We don't share personal feelings or savoy secrets with one another, like sister's would.

(how embarrassing :-)

We don't watch movies late at night with one another and cry because it's a chick flick, like sister's do.

We don't call each other on the phone just to see what the other one is up to, like sister's do.

I'm not saying that having a sister is all Rainbows and Butterflies but there is an advantage as a girl to have a sister. Talking, giggling & sharing secrets about boys as a teenager in high school may have helped me with some heartache? I could do without those needless girl cat fights though.

 Having that close connection with another girl/woman and to have those childhood memories to go over and laugh or cry about in later years.

this is my brother rob and me
My brother Rob and I are eleven months apart in age, he is the brother I share most memories with. Man we use to get into some trouble together and have loads of fun doing it too. Heck we graduated High School together, he live across the street from me with his beautiful wife Jess and their daughter Hailey.

My brothers all taught me how to be tough and to take no crap but it might have helped to be girlie sometimes too. I'm not sure if I would even know how to be a sister if one just magically appeared one day. I'm sure I would let her down by not calling one day or heck for even days at a time. Or perhaps not wanting to watch the newest chick flick but to watch the newest zombie movie out there. Shoot or even just the good old fashioned girl talk....I'll have to ask my closest girl friends if I do that right :-)

There are a few things that I wonder about, like how long this feeling will last and I have two sons and one daughter, is she going to feel like this one day? I hope that her and I can have special moments together and share some girl talk when she is older.

me and my sweet laceybug

rainbow diaries

 

I can remember when i was a little girl and how I would search for rainbows on a rainy day.

Barefoot, hair in pig tail braids and play clothes drenched from the welcoming rain.

Slapping my feet against the pavement where water puddles liked to pool together just for my splashing enjoyment. Running along the street drain in the direction of the rain river, stopping just before the storm drain.

I can still remember the warmth of the pavement and the cool waters clapping the bottoms of my feet.

The moment the weather decided to come to an end, there I was head held high searching the overhead space for my rainbow.

The sweet sun peaking around the clouds, playing an innocent game of peek-a-boo with me from around the puffy clouds. Bringing color back to nature after grey had been swept away.

Ahh why was I in search of this rainbow you may ask?....

The pot of gold of course!

I just knew that I was going to find that rainbows end and have myself that pot of gold.

I didn't know exactly what I was going to do though if I ran into that leprechaun.

I wasn't scared, it didn't keep me from my search.

I did have it in mind though to grab my pot of gold and run if the leprechaun should happen to appear.

Even now as a adult some of my childhood fantasies come to me especially when I see a rainbow.

"Is it this one that holds my pot of gold for me?"

lifting breeze

sitting upon the suttle tree,

among the leaf filled branches that surround me.

the feel of the wind blowing gently across my face,

causing my eyes to close and my mouth to gently open for the breath of fresh air.

no sound in the modern world,

except sound of nature at my ears.

lost in this seductive frame of freedom underneath my feet,

free floating feet dangling from my resting body.

i lean back,

gripping onto the bark as if i am one with this old familiar creature.

i'm leaning back,

to drop down,

to glide down with one thought in my mind.

alone....

all alone....

no cries or complaints of everyday living,

no pushing and shoving of hands upon my back.

dangle,

dangle....

bare feet and legs tucked around the high branch,

arms hanging freely,

hair brushing my arm with a soft tickle.

sun warming my skin and bleaching my long child like hair.

it's summer and i never want it to end.

the birds, the bugs, the sound of the wind wrestling the leaves through the branches,

the tall grass lifting smells of a warm dry day,

soon the sun will lower and the night shall bring new sounds that come with the day of dusk.

i'm ready to look up at the stars....

and reach for my dreams.

time to remember

My name is Emily, I am 15 years old. I live with my grandmother Marilyn in a house that my grandfather Lewis built. It's in a small town by the name of White Oak. My Mimzy Marilyn has been ill this summer and has had me worried. There are times when I find her (like this morning) standing on the front porch just staring out at the long gravel drive. As if waiting for someone to pull down it at anytime.

Who is she waiting for?

I guide her back into the house and set her at the kitchen table and start a pot of coffee. Mimzy stairs at me while I'm busy gathering coffee grounds and water. The rising aroma reminds me that I am home every single time. I sit down next to Mimzy, she smiles at me, I place my hand into hers and I tell her "I love you."

Mimzy's reply "I love you too Rose, you are a sweet girl and I thank you for helping me pull the weeds from the garden this morning." With a shocked expression on my face I begin to look at her with confusion and concern. A little heart broken, I gently squeeze her hand "Mimzy it's me Emily!"

Rose was Mimzy's daughter that had drown in the river while swimming with a group of friends when she was 17. This was a very long time ago. This doesn't happen to Mimzy very often but these spells are happening more frequently and lasting longer. They wear her out and cause her to sleep a lot when time catches back up with her. She claims to never remember the incident's but I'm sure the strong sense of not being in control is frightening her. Finding herself doing unusual things and moments of complete blank are causing her to withdraw a little from me. Mimzy doesn't talk about it much but I can tell it has her worried.

Mimzy and I have had a great week, we are now sitting on the back porch enjoying each glide from the porch swing. Ahh drinking ice cold tea with a little bit of honey and lemon. Feeling a nice end of summer warm breeze blow across the porch while Mimzy and I talk about our plans for her "Rose" garden. It is going to give birth to our favorite...pumpkins. A nice way for us to start off our soon to be harvested fall and a tradition that Mimzy and I have been doing for years.

Ever since my parents past, 5 years ago this December it's been hard for me to adjust but Mimzy has done a great job showing me love and happiness with each passing day! On the 19th of December Mimzy lights candles in remembrance of her daughters and my father. This really does help me, I'm pretty sure it helps both of us. Knowing the we have each other and share sweet stories of the harmonious past.

As I am lost in thought of future events I hear Mimzy get up and tell me that she will be back in a moment. I get up also and begin to wander around the yard running my hand over plants and flowers that belong to Mimzy. She has such a gift a true green thumb, I've never seen a yard quite so alive before, alive and happy. There's a field that i lay in sometimes and remember childhood adventures. I use to have so much fun here as a kid, on weekends, on holidays meeting up with the whole family. Playing Cowboys and Indians in this field with my cousins.

I round the house and head back to the porch, I'm waiting to see if Mimzy is ready for some lunch. I'm ready for some of her blackberry cobbler that she has made for us. I peer up through the porch railing before I climb the stairs, Mimzy is not there. "Well I wander what she could be doing that is taking so long?" I open the wooden screen door and head my way into the kitchen, this is where Mimzy likes to spend most of her time. "Huh! Well maybe she's upstairs?" As I begin climbing the stairs to the second floor I start calling, "Mimzy" "Mimzy are you ready for some lunch?" I'm close to her room and I can hear mumbles seeping past the cracked door. Dust particles glimmering from the peering light escaping through the door cracks. "Mimzy are you okay?" I ask as I open the door to find Mimzy sitting at her vanity combing her long beautiful white hair. Mimzy has a smile on her face and is having a complete two sided conversation with herself and her reflection. She does not recognize her own reflection in the mirror. She keeps asking herself questions~ "How long do you plan on staying?" "Is Lewis going to be there?" "You have such pretty hair may i brush it?"

I raise my hand to my mouth and tears start to roll down my face. I realize at this moment that we are in trouble and we need help. I become frightened and sob for my grandmother, oh I love her so. I will comfort her and never abandon my love for her. I will always remember my Mimzy's love for me and hold her hand as I stand by her side as she has by mine.

corky moment

 

Turning his back to the other that stands behind him.

Ignoring the gestures that she has been throwing into the air.

Next thought that comes to mind.....

she is to tap him on his shoulder!

Excuse me....

EXCUSE ME PLEASE....

No reply.

So another thought comes to mind,

maybe she should just bump him in the arm with her elbow.

This has a chance of working....

This man just doesn't seem to be getting any clues what so ever!

Yeah sure it's quite noisy in here but what is he, nerve shot or something, can't he feel!

Finally losing her patience she grips onto her spork and pokes him in his butt.

With a look of guilt and a taste of anger she says to him "Sorry man but get the FUCK off my foot now!"

i came across this in my journal that i kept from high school~ gosh i must have been about 15 years old when i wrote this~ anyways i got a laugh out of it and i hope that you do too.

inRandom: winter bikini

inRandom: winter bikini

winter bikini

OK so I don't know about anyone else but I'm done with winter....

I'm tired of my skin being pale white and flaky because of the dry air sucking away all my moisture.

I'm done with the freezing temperatures outside.

Still today looking at the snow iced up on the ground and not to mention their calling for more snow tonight.

So as I was getting ready for my day I decided to put my bikini swimsuit on.

Oh don't be mistaken I have clothes on too ~ I would freeze and be miserable if I just walked around with my swimsuit all day.

Just knowing that I have it on thought puts me in a brighter mood.

Makes me feel warmer in a way.

Well and not to mention when my husband comes home and discovers the brightly colored garments with spaghetti string ties.....

it will make his day too.

So all around smiles throughout the day.

This is just one thing I can do to brighten my day and I'm enjoying it!

it was just a dream

Here i am....
Cowered in an unfamiliar house corner. Thunder rolls around me. Darkness sets before me. My breath panting with fear, quivering for shriveled silence.

I know their here...
It's hard for me to move knowing what i know. Knowing that a nightmare has created an uncertain reality for my moment in this time.

The house echo's with thunder that rolls like stalking footsteps. The lighting flashes silhouette furniture of not my own. My nocturnal vision has adjusted to it's natural state. Vision is dampened yet somewhat clear and fear is lingering.

I hear no movement from the level I'm cornered to. I stand strong on two bare feet rushing my moment to the enclosed staircase to make an attempt to survive.
Noise rushes the house, lighting rattles with fury, i crouch on all fours half way up the stairs. Now gripping carpet with grainy felt.
I look up, there one peers down at me...
A man with no good intentions. In one single bound i leap away from the staircase, struggling for breath, for that emotions have it overwhelmed.
I run towards a big open living room that is encased with two single steps on the far side. I run towards them in an attempt to escape.

Lighting and thunder collide and two more men appear. I slip down to my bottom to prevent sudden fate but all it has landed me is three men with no faces. Drenched in the color black they have left me with no clear path to escape.

Man one has a braided rope clutched between both hands. Man two holds a knife with only silver shining from it's blade. Man three is clinching his fists with the noise of black leather piercing the air...
They pounce...and where am i... I'm trapped!
Man one holding with all of his might the rope tightly around my neck, man three gripping my ankles leaving no room to force my body through. Then there's man two straddling my waist pressing down on my body hard, with both hands held together above his head...
Here i am... terrified beyond belief... no place to go... no move to be made. I can feel the tears rolling down my cheeks, crying struggling noise being made.
I begin to gaze out the large windows that have been sprayed with the storms current rain. Eary blades of light dashing down with each bolt of fierce electricity, colliding with the beast of nature.
I close my eyes with fear swelling deep. Nothing but noise of a shattering thunderstorm and my silenced tongue.

In one last attempt of dreary light, i peak through to find my nightmare continued. Man two plunging down towards my chest, his silver blade!
I scream and sit up...still scared i look around the room and am relieved it was only a dream!