Hurry what's the rush i say to myself walking out of the kitchen past the dining room, slowly making my way to the grand staircase. A staircase built to last, a craftsmanship that flows with such elegance and beauty. Something of which i have taken for granted.
I'm not even sure i want to do this...taking my first step onto the honey stained wooden staircase. Key in left hand clinched between my sweaty fingers, hand rail in my right gliding so smoothly as each step is taken. Step after step, dragging my feet as if i am in for such disappointment. Being surprised and the feeling of not knowing does not thrill me in the least. It brings fear into me and makes me second guess even taking the key into my grip. As i continue step after step i begin to realize that i had no choice, that this is something that i must do, almost a path that has been pre-determined for me. I shiver at the very thought and continue my journey up the stairs. Becoming mesmerized by the sound my feet are making with each step taken.
Reaching the second floor stairwell, i begin to make a game of it, almost considering a little song and dance...the rhythm is there, the tip tapping from my tip toes as they dance from step to step allowing an echo chime in a tone that is pleasant to the ear and lifting to the heart.
A sudden halt in silence as i stop upon gazing at the third floor, the final heap of steps. I can almost see a glint of light peering out of the attic door key hole.
I stand there, frozen, i can hear my every breath, feel the beating of my heart.
I hold up the key...I'm curious...so curious.
It's a beautiful key, an old skeleton key with braided circles at the end. Three of them interlinked with one another.
I'm trying to remember why i was given this key to begin with?
Why it's me who has the key now?
Why it's me who is squeezing the handrail that is cool and calming to touch?
Calming me at this very moment.
I begin the final steps that lead me to a door. A door that holds something in it that is just for me. I hold the key that unlocks this door...I'm scared! I'm really scared! I'm not sure how this is going to turn out once i open that door. I'm unsure of me and how i will react. IS it going to make me happy?...IS it going to not open and keep me locked out?...my mind is just racing at these thoughts, encircling me causing my head to spin.
I'm here, I calm my hand, I steady the key...i can now hear the clinks of tiny little pieces of metal that have been made to fit together as i turn the key...i grab ahold of the door knob, it feels warm, very warm and inviting, i calm myself as i begin to open the door. By a door like this i would have expected it to making creaking noises and squeak as the hinges begin sliding against one another. It doesn't though, it's gliding with such grace and beauty, not a rickety noise made, smooth sounds, pleasant sounds.
The door is now open, my eye's are closed because I'm scared, i take in a deep breath and release it with patience and timing. I begin to hear laughter, a playful child's laughter. It's beautiful, i open my eye's and there they are...three children stand before me and in that moment i am overwhelmed with peace and love. There they are, a gift...now they are all mine! Their smile so sweet and mine now complete.
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